Me and Battle Cat were down seeing Nanny Boo Boo today, she's always really happy to see us and I did some more stuff round the house for her. I never really fancied myself as a handy man so I'm a bit surprised at how I know to do some of the things. Anyways we were coming back along Stranmillis Embankment when we ran into Hot Baby Roy again. There was no boat race on today, or if there was it was finished, but he was standing there anyway smoking a shitty role up and looking a bit hungover.
"They should put some benches here," he said.
"I suppose," I said, it wasn't a good conversation starter.
"You've put on some weight since you've quit the crack," he remarked. He's looking far fatter than me these days.
"Let's me and you sit on a seasaw and see what happens," I said to him.
He looked a bit hurt by this and rubbed his tummy, while wincing.
"It's so cold, even though the weather is good," he said shaking his head.
"Are you on felt tips?" I asked.
He shook his head, and said he felt lonely.
I felt a wee bit sorry for him. He's a dirty fucker but I know how he feels.
"Here look at this coming," he said perking up. I turned to see a wee thing coming bouncing up in the distance wearing pop socks and a short skirt and belly top. She was too far off to see her face.
"She's either underage and hot, or legal age and ugly as fuck," he said smacking his lips greedily.
As it turned out she was about thirty and a brute boot, so he was at least half right.
"Come on Battle Cat, it's getting dark," I said, even though it was only about five o'clock. I think Hot Baby Roy knew what I meant.
