I was up town today and by fuck Belfast smells like a shithole and that's saying something because most of the time you have to put up with the fact that most of the city doesn't wash and even those that do don't buy BO spray. I was walking down Fountain Place when an old man stopped and boked up, at first I thought it was just a drunk but when I asked him if he was pissed he shook his fist at me and shouted.
"I'm not blootered! This shithole smells of shit!"
Nasty mouth on the oul fucker. I walked off up the road and bumped into my hot shot banker brother. He was out having a Subway. I asked him how he could eat with the smell, and he said:
"I actually find the smell of shit quite pleasant," then he just turned and walked off before I'd even a chance to say anything more. What a dick!
