Hot Baby Roy came round last night and said that he wanted to know the crack about Bratz. I gave him the DVD back and said I didn't know he'd left it here.
"Great wasn't it!" he beamed proudly.
"I didn't watch it," I shrugged. "And I don't want to watch Wild Child either," I said motioning at the DVD under his arm.
"It's okay," he said, near in tears, "I'll go away."
"No don't," I said. "Come in I'm about to watch Barbwire. It's about bigger girls. Well just one in particular."
Hot Baby Roy licked his lips and waved a box of tissues at me.
"I knew we'd need these," he said happily.
"You're not wanking in my house," I said. "I might, but you can forget it."
"Just a joke," he sniggered. But I'm sure he muttered something about Fabian Wildman letting him do it.
After Barbwire he wanted to stick around and talk about Hot Baby Roy stuff. He said that his favourite song was Girls Aloud's The Loving Kind.
I told him I wasn't keen on it and that it thought it was Call The Shots Part 2. He said this wasn't so and that Call The Shots was about life and stuff but that The Loving Kind was about Ashley Cole cheating on Cheryl and that it was nothing to do with the rest of the band. You can tell this because she wears white in the video and the rest wear black. I told him I heard the Pet Shop Boys wrote it and he got pissed off and changed the subject. He said that the ginger was hot and I asked him if he thought that because he was a ginger too.
He said that had nothing to do with it because lots of non-gingers like her. I told him I didn't think gingers should be allowed to mate with other gingers.
"Who's talking about MATING?" he shouted."I want to FUCK."
