Friday, 3 September 2010

How to Learn Karate by Yourself

The Punchbowl Girl has already found herself some temp work waitressing. It's shit money, shit hours and not enough of them but she doesn't plan on doing it long.

I was in work giving the bosses the death stares. They didn't care. It seems a few people were laid off. I'm surprised I wasn't one of them. It wasn't the same on break today. I ate a packet of Rolo's and drank rank tea with powdered milk. Not the same at all.

The Punchbowl Girl is working tonight so I'm off down Nanny Boo Boo's with a bottle of vodka because I haven't seen her in long enough.

Hot Baby Roy was in his bedroom shouting KEY-EYE! all morning. I wondered what the fuck was up so I went for a nosy. He's learning karate from a book and there's lots of suspect pictures of some dude and his mate waving their arms around in Mataland tracksuits.

I asked him what did key-eye mean and he said it was something to scream at his enemies to scare the willies out of them.

I told him the only thing the book was good for was learning sexy ways of feeling up Hot Firey Love Lady. He looked a bit downhearted when I said this and turned his back to me.

He knows if he gives me the address I'll go round and kick Mother of Bowling Ball through a wall.