Fabian Wildman is Sick, and I'm Sad

Being skint is even worse when you get sick, and Fabian has the sniffles. I blame that bastard Clarence for us waking up in a cold house. Anyways because he was sick and didn't want to go outside it was up to me to go out and steal him some honey and Lemsips. It's a lot different shop lifting when you're not on crack, because when I was on crack I just lifted stuff and away I went but now I'm sober I'm all paranoid and walk round the shop about ten times trying to work out who's a store detective. It's pure balls I had to go to a supermarket because they keep the lemsips behind the counter in most of the wee shops round our way.

After getting home with all my goodies I found that Betty Blue had come round to play nurse for poor Fabian. It made me all glum because she already had lemsips and honey and I just had to take Battle Cat for a long walk. I asked him if he thought I'd ever find a girlfriend. He didn't answer but then again he probably didn't understand the question.

I believe that you heard your master sing, while I was sick in bed

I've been lying around the house today. I woke up with that bloody cold that's been doing the rounds. I'm in bed streaming movies and the like. I've been catching up with the guys and gals of Heroes. I'd sort of lost interest near the end of the last series and the closer felt a bit like they were covering up all the balls ups they'd made in the last series.

That said the new series is kicking ass and they've got back a lot of the good old series 1 feel. I was thinking though that while a lot of the Heroes have cool powers (Matt Parkman can make people his bitches [if he wants], Claire Bennet can fuck herself up and live and Peter Petrelli can steal other people's powers - rock on) there must be some heroes out there with crap powers too: The woman who can smell things on television, or the man who can make bumble bees come out his arse (see what I did there with the whole PC thing - Peace Out).

I found this adult version of Stop the Pigeon on a local music forum (of all places) and it made me chuckle. It's what Byker Grove probably should have sounded like:



I'm going to have more lemsips and go back to sleep.