Ginger Incest

Hot Baby Roy and Hot Firey Love Lady were in the house last night. I was looking at them and thinking that they looked like brother and sister. That's how it is with ginger people. Their gingerness is such a key factor in who they are. It was like watching the start of a bad incest porn movie.

                                                  Incest is best

We were being nice and friendly but I felt like I was only there to hold the legs so I took Battle Cat for a walk and let them get down to some weird sex. I tried to get Hot Firey Love Lady's address out of her but she knew why I wanted it.

She said that violence was no way to sort out anything even a prick like Mother of Bowling Ball. Hot Baby Roy kept silent because I know he's said to her that he doesn't want violent revenge but a check of google searches on my laptop show that when he's here by himself he tries to find VIOLENT KUNG FU CLUBS BELFAST and suchlike.

Hermione Granger is further away than ever and the guy from Abba is a weirdo

I stayed in tonight because I'm skint as fuck and Fabian Wildman sat all sulky and teary eyed trying to start conversations with me about Jacko that I'd no interest in. I was contemplating licking the bowl (that's how far gone I was) when Jonathan Ross came on. I like Johno and I haven't watched him in ages. So I thought I'd check him out. I was so happy to find that his first guest was the sexy Hermione Granger (well, not Hermione really, it was Emma Watson who plays her in the films). Anyways Emma was being all cool and funny and I think I've forgiven her for dating Razorlight (I hate him). Then she turns round and says she has a boyfriend. I was fucking livid I nearly kicked the tv round the house for the rest of the evening. I tried to hold back but I was seriously considering doing it anyway when she says that she had to kiss Ron Weasley and it felt like incest. I felt a wee throb in my crotch and gave myself a good rub down. I was a bit all over the place for the rest of the show until I saw Benny from Abba's sixties band the Hep Stars. Here they are, what a weird bunch of fuckers: