Positive Thinking For Work

Back in work and I'm fully charged to kick corporate ass, I'm gonna make the deals, bust the ass that needs busted for me to get that promotion I'm gonna drag the company to its knees. It's gonna knee for me.

Or some such balls, All my previous enthusiasm is gone. I spoke to Betty Blue at break and I asked her if she was calling me a stalker. She said no that she was talking about Clarence Pishflap who had went out with Sandcastles and was now stalking The Unicorn Girl. I told her that I hated Clarence Pishflap and that him and that dick Mother of Bowling Ball were going to get kickings if they tried to hit Hot Baby Roy, Betty Blue said that she remembered Hot Baby Roy and she always thought he was a bit creepy too. I told her that Hot Baby Roy had a girlfriend and they were going great and that he nice now and he was very nice to Battle Cat.


"Aw, you're wee dog," she shouted. "How's he doing these days? He was so cute."
"He great, still cute, but bigger now, still not biting people."

She laughed at that, I wanted to say something about Fabian Wildman and how he was a dick for what he did to her, but I couldn't it was too awkward over egg sandwiches.

Where Does Fun Happen In Belfast?

Fabian Wildman came round to the house last night when I was in by myself. He knocked the door and since I was up lying in bed having a wank with the light off I just pretended not to be in. He knocked for a while and tried his old key in the lock (!) but I'd luckily snibbed it. I'm getting the locks changed, I completely fucking forgot he still had a key.

Battle Cat went up to the door and barked at him. He stood and had a long conversation with Battle Cat. I couldn't hear what he said but he looked so lonely wandering off up the street afterwards.

It's funny because yesterday was the first time I'd talked to Betty Blue in work. I walked into the canteen when she was having her lunch at the window and since all the tables were full I sat down beside her.

"How's it going?" I asked.

"Not bad, I'm over in England at Uni, just back for the summer. How's you?"

"Good," I said but I could tell she saw the misery in my face.

"It's an exciting job isn't it?" she laughed.

I nodded and tucked into my white bread egg sandwhich and tea with whitener.