Mother of Bowling Ball is in for The Wildest Kicking After I Finish Work

Today in work I realised I'm the only one left from when I started. The Punchbowl Girl was fired, Betty Blue is back at Uni, even Kissy Boy has fucked off.

I just sit at my desk and try to pass the time being ruder to rude customers.

Funnily enough today I was on the phone to a particularly rude bastard who I call Mother of Bowling Ball. He didn't recognise my voice and started screaming about how our customer service was crap and how he'd come down to the call centre and bust our skulls. I politely calmed him down and talked him through everything I was going to fix on his account (none of which I did - he's so fucking screwed when his next bill comes in).

At the end of the call he slammed the phone down after making a passing dig about how he'd better not have to call us back. I took out a piece of paper and scribbled down his address. I'll be making a wee visit to him after work just to see if he wants to talk tough then.

Get ready for some kung-fu.

Call Centres Make Me Want To Smoke Crack

November is a miserable month, I'm all trying to keep things street and at work we're being told how to fleece people. See in all the contracts there's these wee clauses (not my work one, the ones that customers sign up to) and they say that customers aren't allowed money back if they don't want our products anymore but in court they could get it back (that was a struggle). This is bullshit, we're supposed to sit and say "read the small print (and weep)" and why should we, it's not as if we get any richer by ripping them off, I'm on a fixed hourly rate that will increase every year slightly below inflation.

I didn't know half this shit until some dude in the training started spouting it out. He wasn't there by the end of the day. I wish it had of been the fat hoors bastard because he's just caught on that one of the other guys is gay and he's started making all these really bad gay jokes and when no one laughs he says "What are yous like, I'm just being some craic!" Dunno about craic, I'd prefer a bit of crack after the money comes in.

Then when someone else says something properly funny he just sits with a big grumpy face and tries to outdo them with a big sweary gay joke, whoors bastard that he is.