Harry Potter and The Half Blood Prince

Hot Baby Roy had Harry Potter and The Half Blood Prince and a big bowl of home popped pop-corn waiting for me when I got home last night.

He was so excited and said this was going to be the best thing since we met the Leotard Girls. I was very excited too and had been lucky to have bought a big bag of Doritos on the way home.

We sat down and got ready for a whole evening of Hermione and the other peeps. Hot Baby Roy very quickly started talking about how sexy Emma Watson looked but I asked him not to break my suspension of disbelief; I liked to think I was spending the evening with Hermione Granger, not an actress playing her.

He said this was cool and we watched the whole thing without him spoiling it for me once, we salivated and mopped it off or mouths and chins with doritos and popcorn then at the end of the evening sad as we were (I won't spoil the ending) we went up stairs and wanked. (I could say I assumed that Hot Baby Roy wanked but that's like saying if it's wet outside that you assumed it has rained, not that I saw any fluid from him).

Shoplifting in Belfast

I'm just back into the house now with my bag of goodies. I went in the city centre this morning to get a present for Fabian's leaving. I started by shoplifting a copy of Catcher in the Rye that I promised someone I'd read. I thought while I was doing it that it seemed like something a teenage rebel would do so I felt very cool about that.

I haven't started it yet but I've heard all sorts of stories about it making people want to assassinate famous people, like the dude who shot John Lennon. I watched a movie about him once (or started to) but it just seemed like this fat asshole walking about being a cock so I didn't watch the rest.

Then I had to get moving because I wanted to get a good present for Fabian. I'll be sad to see him go because he's been a good housemate, and we've both looked out for each other and had a lot of laughs. He has most stuff that he needs for the house so I decided to steal him a book on 20th Century Art, just so he'll know what all the arty peeps he's living with are talking about.

I think Fabian's wanting Hot Baby Roy to move in and though I like him fine I don't want to live with him because the place will just turn creepy and to be honest I've seen Battle Cat looking at him sometimes like he's going to pounce. Hot Baby Roy doesn't deserve that but Battle Cat's his own dog!

Finally I stole a couple of bottles of wine and Doritos (cool original flavour) and dip.

Tonight's gonna rock like a smoking hot screaming wild sweaty metal guitar solo!