The Punchbowl Girl is like being totally weird

I've been in work now since nine o'clock. I asked The Punchbowl Girl if she wanted to go to my brother's birthday but she said that she had something on that day, something vague. I asked her if I could have her number because I wanted to send her a text when I was off but couldn't.

She looked a bit awkward and gave it to me. After I keyed it in she said that she had to go back to work and walked off to her desk. She was sitting between two other people so I couldn't even sit with her.

I've been trying to work out what's wrong and here's my options:

1) She reads my blog and doesn't appreciate all our red hot sex life being telegraphed to all the world.

2) She thinks it's a bit soon to be meeting my family. This one if fair enough because we haven't even went on a date yet or agreed we're a couple. We're only colleagues who shag.

3) Typical guy thoughts about girls that I won't put here because I think they're the most unlikely of the three and if 1) is true writing them here will cause no end of shit.

Any thoughts on what it could be? 

Lonely Mrs. Puddinghead - Part 2

So I've this plan to get a new job and I pop off to the job centre to find that it's full of folk wanting jobs, all the oul gang are still there but they're outnumbered by all these high fallutin types wanting work. It's not cool, except Mrs Puddinghead is well busy and really pissed off that's she's speaking to people who actually want to work for a change.

I start looking through the jobs and see there's one for a kissogram. I think this would rock for me because I could borrow Fabian Wildman's Zentai and rock out to fuck in a house full of lovely ladies all wanting kissed. I would but I remember one time spying on Mrs. Puddinghead (out of boredom) and seeing a male kissogram show up to her lonely house night after night but then one night the kissogram didn't come any more and I asked The Albino about it one time he was in a good mood and he laughed and told me that she'd been blacklisted by every kissogram company in the province because she always liked to look on their visits as dates and wanted to move their relationship to the next level but they wouldn't and how she cried and begged and bought them chocolates and expensive brandy. He laughed so much his cheeks turned a pinkish-white. Nasty bastard.

I don't like Mrs Puddinghead but that's one of the saddest stories I've ever heard. I remembered her crying the other week and I still think she's a bitch but I can't help but feel sorry for her. I think I'll just avoid her in here if I can (I was trying to do that anyway) or just recognise that her nastiness is just a reaction to the love she sees everywhere but never feels herself.