What to do if your boss won't pay you

So in this shitty economic climate where some complete wankers think the solution is to lower minimum wage (go fuck yourselves, seriously) it seems a boy like me farting through silk to get his bills paid needs to be a suave mutherfucker.

I've been working part time and temping to top my wages up. One company I temp for (or temped for) are particularly bad and often send me to jobs that turn out not to be booked, and even when I do the work pay arrives late. One particular job I did, I waited three weeks for pay but without it appearing in my bank account.

At the end of the second week I told my handler (MI5 joke) that I needed this money to pay bills and that I did the work and it was only right that they paid me. My handler told me that she'd talk to someone in the office to sort something out and blah blah blah but most importantly she'd ring me back in five minutes. By the end of the day I hadn't heard anything (this was Friday two weeks in). I called on Tuesday, the payroll day wanting to know the status of my payment. I was again told that I'd be called later and it would all be sorted out. No call came. I knew I was being passed on, especially when I called back and wasn't able to speak to my handler (who was out of the office/on the phone to another client/dancing round the office to inane pop music while lighting a cigar for satan with the money that should be coming my way). I told the guy who answered the phone that I wanted that money paid to me on Friday and he started doing all the polite job agency crap of mispronouncing my name (who the fuck mispronounces Tuesday Kid?), and saying thinks like 'how many hours do you think you've worked?' So I told him that it wasn't a case of thinking. I knew what I worked and I wasn't going to let his company fuck me around. At this point he said that my language was unacceptable. I told him that waiting three weeks without pay was unacceptable, at which point he started to repeat that my language was unaccep-'FUCK YOU.' I shouted down the phone at him and hung up.

The next day when I called I was put on to my handler who told me that if I called into the office they'd pay me my money in cash. Which I did and they did.

While I was there I was told that they wouldn't be able to use me again after the way I'd spoke to the guy.

I told them that I didn't want to work for them again because I couldn't be sure I'd get my money next time.

Then I rode off into the sunset and all that cowboy shit.

The thing is, I tried to be nice and follow procedure and be polite to all parties and generally just be a good guy, and hope that everyone else would be good to me back. No such luck, only when I ring them up and hurl abuse does everyone stop acting like an asshole.

They were lucky they gave in before I started throwing headbutts.